lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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