I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
