I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
