I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
