Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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