I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
