dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize