I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
