What tipped you off? The sombrero?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Randomize
