oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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