I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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