K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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