She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
