Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Do vagina's smell?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize