I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
