so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
