i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize