Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
