We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
