This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
