my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
he puts the penis in happiness.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
