So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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