Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
It's shark week go big or go home
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
