It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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