Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
