And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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