in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
did i walk over a car last night?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
