I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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