I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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