youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
