dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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