I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize