my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
