I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
wrigley field is MILF paradise
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
