At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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