This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
