I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize
