by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize