I have demons in me.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
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