I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
