she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize