What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize