HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
