He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
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