Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
