then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
