Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
