i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize