Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
i out mim tonsoeep
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