We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
