My liver just broke up with me...
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
